You are never given the dog you want, but the dog you need.

A light at the end of the tunnel

There are just some days that I am not motivated whatsoever to write anything. Then there are days where everything is a giant ball of stress and don’t even make me think about coming up with a topic to blather on about. This week has been a horrible combination of both these things. Between studying frantically for exams: round one, I just did not have nearly enough time to come up with decent topics to share, at least none that really related to this blog. Rants? Oh yes. Actual interesting topics? Eh, not so much.

I don’t know, I won’t delude myself into thinking that there are many out there who actually are interested in the works of Chaucer or any other medieval literature. Maybe there are, but my experience has taught me that whenever I even mention authors from that period, I just get blank stares. But, as I’m a bookworm and literature geek, I’m used to this reaction.

One question is still baffling me from one of my medieval exams though. “Based on the geographic location of the battle in the text, can The Song of Roland be considered early military propaganda?” I have no idea. I really doubt that my answer was correct, nor can I actually remember what I wrote. All I know is that my teacher will probably get a great deal of amusement out of reading that answer and my snarky side comments next to my quote id’s and short answer id’s.

Therefore, today is going to be a bit of a de-stress post that will involve, most likely, a great deal of off topic rambling about my life, thoughts, and random babble. If that’s not a great tie-in, I don’t know what is.

As a result of this week, I think I may have gone to the gym once maybe? I honestly couldn’t tell you. My running schedule has been completely set aside until Monday, and I still have a bunch to do this weekend. I still have a basketball game to play at, a research paper on the burial rituals of the Paracas to start, a book report to write (Ok, I have to laugh at that. Book reports in college…ridiculous), and class discussion questions to come up with. But it’s ok, because I know that the end of the stress will come and soon my life will return to its former busy schedule and I can breathe a sigh of minor relief.

It seems like the week has just gone on for an eternity. As if the end of it all is some teeny tiny pinprick of light at the end of a very, very long and dark tunnel. Have you ever had days/weeks like that? They’re terrible and should be banned. I’ve also realized something that makes me laugh a little bit every time I think of it.

Remember those naps that you had to take in pre-school/kindergarten (or maybe didn’t)? Those were the best. When else during school or work is there a designated nap time? There are some days that I am genuinely jealous of kids for that ability.

I mean, seriously, who wouldn’t be all for their boss coming to see them during work and saying, “Hey, nap time. Get that blanket out and sleep. Get back to work in a half hour or so.”

Some days, that sounds like the best thing since sliced bread. But, it’s a bit of a pipe dream and will probably never happen in real life, as sad as that makes me to admit.

After staying up until nearly 3 or 4 am every night this week to get everything done and then dragging myself out of bed at 7 or maybe 8 (if I’m lucky), a break is needed. Or at least a breather. Luckily, this is my final semester before graduation. Do I have any idea yet as to what I really want to do with my life?

Nope. Not really. But you know what? I’m okay with that. Going into my major, I knew I would never have one of those high powered, bring in all the money, kind of jobs. I accepted that with a glad smile. Why? Because I love what I do. I love writing and reading other people’s works and giving feedback. That, and there is so much freedom allowed with my focus. I can concentrate on what I actually want to do with my life. If I want to be a novelist (quite possibly), if I want to do this for a living, if I want to go into publishing (still would love to), or whatever else. It’s me. I have the freedom to follow whatever dreams I may have, but writing will always be a part of them. Some days, writing seems like a chore but once I actually start, things start flowing. Kind of like this post.

I had no idea what to write about today, but I knew that I had to make up for being such a terrible updater this week. So, I figured that something is better than nothing, even if my something is a rambling bunch of drivel. I leave you with cuteness as pictured down below, in typical fashion. As usual, don’t forget to click that FreeKibble button in the side bar and help feed some hungry animals! But seriously, how adorable are these two? Best. Snuggle buddies. Ever.

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4 responses

  1. You write very well, like an Aspie — and that’s a compliment. Hope you get your rhythm back soon. I can relate.

    February 11, 2012 at 3:54 pm

    • Thank you! Writing is a great passion of mine and it’s always nice to hear a compliment for it 🙂 Some weeks are just like that though. I think it’s so we can appreciate the good/great days even more when they come around.

      February 11, 2012 at 4:11 pm

  2. Kudos to you for doing what you really love the FIRST time around. Seriously. I took every literature class that I could — that is, as many as you have room for when you choose a business major. Two decades later, I’m working my way back to writing — better late than never, right? (BTW, I spent quite a few late nights at William & Mary, in the 1990s, working on a parody of the Canterbury Tales for a final….literature dorks unite!)

    February 11, 2012 at 4:10 pm

    • Haha thank you! It took me three switches in majors before I realized “Hey, you know that thing you’re really good at? Why don’t you, and here’s a thought…Why don’t you just major in it already?!” It’s funny to look back on it now. It just took me a while to realize what I really wanted to study. I’m in love with the Canterbury Tales right now 🙂 It’s not easy to read the old language all the time, but the little doses in humor make it worthwhile! Congratulations for getting back into writing, better late than never indeed 🙂

      February 11, 2012 at 4:15 pm

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